Betsey, Wow. You have given me so much to think about. I too was struck by Meredith's comments a few days ago, and have been replaying them in my head. Meredith and I have also talked about people just wanting the marriage back, and being surprised the H comes with it. I am certain that this does not pertain to us, which brings about these questions that are so hard to answer. This is scary territory, isn't it, Bruce?
I often worry about all the changes I've made vs. the nearly none that H has made. It was confirmed by my MC who told me that I was "moving along" at a much quicker pace than H. I realize that I am very lucky to have H in counseling. I am hoping that you will get back to it also. It is one thing for our H's to hear something from us; far different for them to hear it from a "professional."
Like I said, I have lots to think about. I have nothing brilliant to offer you at this time; I guess I just wanted to let you know that I support you totally.
You have so much common sense, and you seem to effortlessly zero in on what needs to be addressed in each new dilemma. I know that high-speed Betsey brain will toss this around a little and figure out just what is needed. Yes, these slow moving creatures are killing us. But, Betsey, I truly and honestly believe that we hold the keys that will make these marriages work. I feel as if you and Meredith handed me my key. I have such a deeper understanding now. I know you already had it. This is what will carry you through. So, again, no great words of advice. Just my constant faith and admiration in you.
