TM, Your question is a tough one. I would always put my child first. I know that you had plans, but you really don't know what your xh is really thinking at this point. The divorce may have now just hit her and she could be capable of anything until the full reality has settled in.
Listen to your gut instinct when it comes to your child. At some point, you can put a boundary in place, but I suspect it will be quite a while down the road.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
