Glad you're back, ces! Been thinking about you and your dilemma.

Have you ever thought of meditation? It can really help with the mind you describe. It has made a big difference for me and all it takes to get started is 10 minutes a day.

Or you could google contemplative prayer as that might be more helpful for you.

About the souvenirs, that's just what they are. Like corsages from proms or tickets from concerts. They remind her of something that was, if only in her mind. I wouldn't give those things too much power now. When you R, down the road you can ask that she get rid of them if she doesn't on her own. But for now, let sleeping dogs lie.

Have you talked here about what you think she got from the "relationship"? Usually it's excitement and the feeling that someone is risking something to be with you.

How can you add those things to your R?

Me 57/H 58
M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13

Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do.
I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering.
Caroline Myss