Lots of thinking done. Conclusion is I am getting off this train. He is no where near deciding he needs help, and his family and the little girl are only prolonging this as well. They are on their own with him now. I sent him the following email last night-to hell with the program. THis was for me. C, Yes, I have been busy, traveling for a few days, preparing for the future, and making decisions for the three of us. It is not you but the situation that I find bothersome. I understand and accept you as you are after all these years and hold no anger. And as you pointed out many times, my brain is funny in that I tend to focus on the good not the bad and have odd tastes in people. I am only looking to continue forgetting the bad parts of the past, and start on this new unplanned journey. That has been the case during the week we have not been in contact in that I have had time to think and have forgotten so much of the bad, finding an inner peace I did not know existed before. The rest has already been said before so need not be repeated here. The three of us will be fine on this path that has been chosen for us as S&P deserve only happiness, security, and love. If you ever need us, we will try to be there for you.
I have already sent you the travel documentation when I made the arrangements for you and am sorry if you cannot find it. As to the Sprint issue, I have been unable to access that account as "someone" changed the password on it the day I cancelled. Coincidentially, my FB account, both my Skype accounts, and both my personal email accounts were hacked by someone with my passwords at some point when you were here or during the time we were together at X so I have had to deal with that issue as well.
The John Lennon song "How" you posted is beautiful, the lyrics are interesting, and I wonder if that is how you feel. But you see I am going forward because I am sure of things and time continues to pass.
And I thank you so much again for the scarves from X. They will always be among my most treasured possessions as are the other gifts you gave to me over the years. They are beautiful and I will wear them with great pride and depth of emotion, always reminding me of you. So thank you.
Please let me know Monday if you still want to stop out here and say goodbye to the kids as I need to make my schedule for the week and continue with planning for the future for the three of us. Otherwise have a safe trip. Peace, M,S,P
