Wow, Trish, I really don't have much to report. Well, I guess I could log the 2 conversations I've had with Mr. MLC. So here goes:
Yesterday afternoon, he rang my cell phone on the way to the airport. I was pretty surprised. Actually, at first when it rang, I was annoyed. I was just really rocking with Michael McDonald (his Motown CD rocks), but I quickly overcame my annoyance.
He was very chipper and on his way to turning in his old job stuff (read: secret military crap that I'd have to die for if he told me).
Going to digress here because I want to take a minute to log something that is now very obvious. He initiates calls when he makes them from his car. I conclude that he does think about me when he's not got distractions in front of him. And the thought of me makes him happy ( could this be so?) because he's always happy and cheerful when he calls. Note: WHAT IS THIS ALL ABOUT?
He asked me if I had my cousin in my car and I told him no, that I was still on my way. He wanted to go over the schedule for today (Friday) and get on the same page. He got to the base and had to turn off the phone, so we hung up.
Today, he also called me from his car. I answered the phone the way I always do at work and he speaks up, "HEY, Betsey!" Wow, this is a little enthusiastic, even for me!
He wants to remind me (but he never told me, so how could this be a reminder?) that D6 has physical therapy this afternoon and wanted to know what D9 wanted to do--go with me and D or spend the night with him? I told him either way, it did not matter to me.
He said he would give her first right of refusal and would be happy either way. I said, "Fine, just let me know what I'm doing so I can make sure everything is covered." He said, almost obnoxiously optimistic, "Of course! I always do!"
Has the alien imposter returned the real Mr. Wonderful back and done a memory erasure on him? For one year, he hasn't always been forthcoming with his plans. Who is he kidding?
So he then said, "Oh, Bets, before you hang up (I guess he noticed that I'm doing it first now), I need to tell you my travel plans next week. I'm leaving Monday night and coming back Tuesday night. I figured since D is with you, that he can help out on Tuesday. Is this okay?" I said yes.
Then he told me, laughing, "Wow, I'm going to miss bowling Tuesday night." I'm thinking, "Oh, yes, the middle aged renditions of high school boys are going to miss your drinking, farting and burping and your excellent bowling skills. What a pity."
Instead, I was nice and said, "Oh, that's too bad. Did you get a sub?" He said, "No. Gary is going to get one. After all, I've been covering for those guys for 3 years now and never taken off. They can figure this out."
What? Miss bowling and not get a sub? Where did the alien go?
And before I hung up, he asked me for one more favor: to make time to drive him to my work to pick up the traveling homeless shelter so he can bring it back to the apartment complex. I asked, "How are you going to get back to get your car?" I should have known: "Oh, Gary and I are spending the day together tomorrow after I get this stuff done. He can follow me to the house."
OH, yes. Gary. The love of his life. Spending the day together? What's up with that? He never uses terminology like that. All guys say stuff like, "Oh, Gary might come over for a beer and we can watch the game..."
I have no idea what this means, but I figure it will all play out if I just keep the channel on the same station and be patient.
D9 gets home from school in about 15 minutes, so I'm sure someone will call and tell me what is happening tonight. This is just too weird.
Does this satisfy the Mr. Wonderful update requirement, Trish?
Now, the question is: How can I get him to move into his car? It sounds like that's the happening place--he thinks of me there, is happy about that fact and does it predictably.
Any ideas? I wonder if the motor home would count?
Betsey
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
Yes, the motor home probably would count, but it is already taken, remember?
Wow, if my husband's name was Gary I think I'd finally know where he disappears to when he rolls the rock over his cave entrance! You described him perfectly! Maybe it is just something the aliens do to all the husbands they beam up.
Seriously though, I see so many positives in that post! Your guppy is swimming like mad trying to catch up to you! GO YOU!!!!
"It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere."
--Agnes Repplier, writer and historian
I was dyin"to get back here...Gabe nearly drove me over the edge last night!! He had to do some kind of forms on line.......
He seems to have gotten a little resolution to his job dilema, but is depressed a bit too, he wants some certainty that he made the right decision. I don't seem to be able to give that to him. He was also looking for an apartment on line very late last night, I had finally fallen asleep and was headed to bed but he was asking all kinds of questions about rents deposits, utilities, etc....
(((((((Betsey!)))))))) I think your realization about Mr. W was FANTASTIC!
Looking back over your posts I see the same pattern.
He initiates calls from his cell phone that are always more positive, upbeat and focused.
He gives "better" responses to you when he is relaxed and driving.....without work distractions....or friends around.
Looks like you have become aware of a very valuable tool!!!
But I hope what you have become even more aware of is....He likes you!!!
My god!!!!! He LOVES YOU!!!!!
He wants to have positive interaction with you!!! He is finding ways to get it AND ways to give you more undivided attention.!!
Yes, my dear sourpuss friend
I hope this answers your quote: WHAT"S THIS ALL ABOUT???
Also he clearly wants more of YOUR individed attention........
"Do you have your cousin in the car with you??"
Not only does he think about you but he has found a way to show you!!!!
He has been working with you more than I think we give him credit for.
Think back over all the holiday co-ordination, my gosh you guys even on a daily basis, have always seemed to have a lot of coordinating with D6 and 9 going on. It has made you into good co-parents, good co-"workers" good co-partners!!!
Good communicators.....
I think of how much has had to have been handled, communictaed clearly and concisely to avoid the usual pitfalls of plain old parenting and with your sitch it's even more comlicated!! And you guys practically have it down to A SCIENCE!!!!!!
I have not once heard from you that you guys majorly messed up on schedules for either D....never dropped the ball in terms of your time committments to schools, after school activities, physical therapy sessions, doctor's visits, dental visits, social committments for both D's!!! my goodness the list goes on and on......You two are SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO far ahead of the average parents!!!
Take if from someone who knows!!!
I have taken on four kids schedules and I know first hand the sheer ENERGY it takes to keep everyone going in the right direction, at the right time, with the right equipment and a good attitude!!
What you are accomplishing is almost nothing short of miraculous...and you've done it TOGETHER!!!!!!!!!!
I just laughed my A*** off about the bowling!!
So he can grow a little tooo eh?
Good for him....maybe he is getting his priorities a little clearer....and you were able to be soo sweet about it No nasty comments.....
let's find a way for you to give him a little positive reinforcement on that if you can....Honestly, I can't think how....what about: "It's great Gary was able to help you out and find you a sub." Let's him know that depending on his friend to do something for himslef...not Mr. W having to do it is great. Actually your reaction probably spoke volumes....
You are right not to let the "day togther" comment get to you....maybe they have a major clean up project in store? The main thing is he is letting you know his schedule of activity and who he is doing things with.....in fact I wouldn't be surprised if he really had NOTHING planned he just wants you to think he is busy...and doesn't want you to think it's with a woman!!
I think you should both spend time together in the car!!
Or the motor home......
Wait strike that....
The motor home would need to be sterilized first!!
So he's already setting up the project of getting rid of it WITH YOU haahahaha!!!!!
Boy is that ever a golden opportunity for jokes if I heard one......
Ever hear Chris Farley's, " In a VAN!!! down by the RIVER" guy????
You kill me! And I very much appreciate you pointing out the further positives...
Yes, he was nice today on our way to the motor home. I got a new pair of really cheap sunglasses (my really good ones are very outdated and D9 tells me so)--he commented that they looked good. Not on me. Just looked good.
I sort of looked in the vanity mirror jokingly and said, "Well, it IS important that I look good. Because I need to hear the words: DUDE, YOU SO TOTALLY ROCK!" He looked at me like I was the newfound alien...
D9 laughed.
So our plans today have taken on a different turn. My cousin is so sick with that flu I had over the holidays. He's going to hang out here and watch movies while the girls and I run errands. Right now, he and D6 are watching Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (a very much loved movie here).
D9 got her ears pierced last night and they look cute.
All is well here... and much better when he hangs out in his car. How to get him to spend more time in there since he doesn't like driving much is the dilemma...
Just keep swimming!
Betsey
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
could this be so?) because he's always happy and cheerful when he calls. Note: WHAT IS THIS ALL ABOUT?
