can Turtles still stand?

[zig]

thanks for your reply - it took me a day or so to digest, and the result is my answer on the bootcamp thread.

as for being worried about having convinced h too much - i see what you mean. i get your point

so what did i work through today and yesterday - so many new insights, both about myself and about our sitch.

i've worked through some fears, things that i see now were still holding me back.

and sg's request - that and your comments nudged me over to a better place.

at the end of my yoga - i lay there in shivasana - and what she'd written came into my mind. and suddenly i saw how i didn't feel i deserved or was worthy of what she'd asked me to do. and i just lay there and repeated to myself - i can acknowledge that i have something to give and to get. i do deserve love, appreciation for who i am, acknowledgement from others and then finally i became able to say I do deserve to acknowledge myself to myself.

and i was thinking these things as much as feeling them - a huge difference. i was really for the first time able to truly acknowledge my own worth to myself.

and i think that's when i emerged from the dark clouds into the blue sky above (as labug gave us today)

it was also then that i was able to just get up and calmly write that post.

sg's words: "I became accountable" - have started to haunt me. in a good way. suddenly i can see so clearly how i have NOT been accountable to myself. I have always been accountable to others in my mind, but rarely truly to myself

it's time to move forward with that.


And DO UNDERSTAND... that even those that have been here for a while... we all do need support... or an outside perspective, when we hit a wall where we are stuck... See in the "surviving D" and MLC threads where members are D and still have things they want / need to work throug

thanks for this KD - sometimes i get so self-involved, i forget this. but luckily I have you here to remind me

alot happened yesterday, so will go on to post that next

hope you're having a kickass weekend

zig