One last thought, I'm coming to the realization that I'm not OK with having a husband in name only. It's been almost 18 months and while I don't think I've wasted that time or that I would be any further in recovery had we D earlier, I'm not quite sure what is to be gained by standing.
I have a good life. I have 2 great sons. I have loving friends. I have a great house easily affordable on my income. I live in a lovely community that I enjoy. I have a job I enjoy going to where I work with fun, knowledgeable, supportive people. I am healthy. I have many interests. I'm not getting younger. It's a fact.
I want someone to enjoy all of the above with me. If my H is not stepping up to that then I have a decision to make.
When I felt the heartache again this week, I thought "I'm tired of this."
And today it's not as scary as it was yesterday.
I'm not going to run out today or next week and change anything but the wind is shifting.
Me 57/H 58 M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13
Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do. I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering. Caroline Myss
