Thanks for your cheerleading!!! I am just pretty down today! Has anyone ever woke up and said "you know what I really love my S and want the M, but I don't want to put my Db hat on today. I am tired of trying to show someone how I geniunly care for them when they obviously have no desire to do it in return. I don't want to put my game face on today and pretend that things don't bother/hurt me when they do. I am tired of always having to be cheery when H finaly comes around when I am obviously hurting and just want to cry."
Can anyone tell me how they have delt with this feeling? I have a feeling I am about to hear that I need patience. I know I do, but it has never been one of my better virtues. I feel like I have been patient for the 10 mo separation and just want things to end!! Either D or come home and work it out.
Someone give me some advice to get out of this funk.
UNDERDOG... SORRY FOR MONOPOLIZING YOUR THREAD!! THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE PEICING FORUM!!
One thought on the words of affirmation - That's definitely my LL (receiving). And one reason we discovered why it was so difficult for my H to speak it when we were going through our rough times - is he has SUCH a self-critical voice in his own head. Apparently, the negative criticisms I got were NOTHING compared to the negative way he talks to himself in his own head, poor baby!
(I, on the other hand, have a voice in my own head that's maybe a little TOO positive - "oh honey, who cares about that extra 20 lbs., you still look great, even without makeup and in sweats" )
Yes, aren't we our own worst critics? I've only recently swung to this half full glass full time! I'm with you, Ellie. This positive place is a whole lot more fun than the place that issues stinking thinking ultimatums...
Instead of finding something wrong with the face I see in the mirror, I say instead,
"HEY BETSEY!!! You're a really nice person--a good friend, a patient wife and a rocking mom! Nobody else could do this like you can!"
Oh, man, I think I'm in love now... I just spoke my own LL!
Now I need to get the heck out of here, fill my REAL gas tank with gasoline--the beast is running low, and I have to drive to East Jesus Kansas to pick up my cousin...
Thanks for all the WORDS OF AFFIRMATION!
Betsey
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
Quote: You're in HR... do you think you could send him a memo to tell him to get his act together? And if he doesn't, can you find a way to terminate his employment so I don't have to pay unemployment?
But of course! The letter is below. You are not obligated to pay any unemployment for an involuntarily termination based on work performance...so you're set there!
AH AH AHEM....
Dear Mr. Wonderful,
This memo is in regards to your recent attendance to your marriage. Mr. Wonderful, I know you agree that a workplace’s efficiency is directly related to our employees. As such, the lack of attendance we are seeing on your part is causing a breakdown of that efficiency. Your co-workers and manager are becoming fatigued and frustrated by having to take on your tasks as their own in your absence. Their fatigue and frustration is also diminishing the aforementioned efficiency, to the point that it has been brought to my attention.
As the HR coordinator for your department, I strongly encourage you to consider improving your recent attendance. Mr. Wonderful, the last thing you want to do in these stressful economic times is cause your group to become comfortable functioning without you.
In order to focus your attention on the tasks that you have neglected in your absence (to name a few: words of affirmation for Betsey and D6, quality time with D9, martial commitment and motor-home door bouncing) we are restricting both your vacation and sick leave effective immediately. Any time-off must be scheduled through me, in advance. Any sick time taken must be called in to me, and be accompanied by a physician’s note. I highly encourage you to take this notice seriously, Mr. Wonderful. I would hate to remind you of the stack of resumes on my desk containing the names and qualifications of those people seeking a your very position (including one very hot sportscaster in your area – NOT the DB board).
Sincerely,
Anchor the Shark, HR coordinator for Betsey’s marriage
"It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere."
--Agnes Repplier, writer and historian
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