2 Questions, putting aside the craziness of violence and suicide, would someone have a minute to explain to me what is going on?

1. Why does he refuse to tell the "adults" in our lives that we are split up? For example, at the university the director of the program told him how happy he was to see an academic based couple so close, so perfect together, and so happy together. He just froze, then smiled and thanked the man. The man that was staying with us there is one of our best friends, and he did not know until I told him either.