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[Denver_2010]

I'd advise you to look into getting legal counsel for yourself. I'm an attorney and can't advise that you proceed without counsel; especially since she already has an attorney.

Otherwise, the paperwork is a tough issue. Personally, I would not have signed any paperwork had my W asked me to early on in our S.

She did ask me if I would go to the court to file together. Our exchange was:

W: "well, you can file for D with me to save time. I'm free tomorrow, Friday, and m-Th next week... you are deceitful and I cannot trust you. We will never work again. That is reality. ..."

My response: "I've told you before that I still love u and still think that we an have a great life together as both a couple and a family. I have not changed my mind on that. But I understand that you are not happy, that u don't feel happy or complete inside. U need to do what will make u happy. By my side, we can be partners and will share everything and we would do anything to help one another. But that's only if we continue as a team. but I won't stand in your way, but also won't help u leave this marriage or our family. I hope that u do find happiness u r looking for. go do what u need to do. You know where I will be."

I included her words just to give you context of how bad my sitch was at the time. Good times.

Anyway, my point is that I was not going to help her with the D in any way. I decided early on that I needed to buy as much time as I could. I did this knowing that I risked making her angry. To me, it was choosing between two options, neither of which were good. It wasn't just the physical work of filing that I was counting on. It was the emotional work that I knew it would require of her. Now, your sitch is a bit different, because your W has an attorney and my W did not. But I don't see why you don't have the same option here. You could sit on the paperwork and wait until you hear from her or her attorney. When you do, you could give her a similar line that i gave my W. OR... you could go along with things and provide the edited version of the paperwork. It is a tough call. I don't think that you have a GOOD move here. You have to pick which you think is the least bad move. Hate to put it that way, but it is reality.

Personally, I'd go with sitting on the paperwork and making her do the work. To me, that says that you are fighting for your M, whereas the other says that you are giving in. That's just me.

Denver