Been out of touch for a while as my job takes me to remote corners, and I have been in the field most of the summer.
Today is my 52nd birthday, and it is bittersweet to say the least. Realized it is my third bday in a row that has left me sad and depressed, timing which fits perfectly with the crumbling of my R. In addition, last week marked the one year anniversary of my xW moving out of state. Dark clouds keep swirling, to say the least.
Trying my damnedest to GAL and move on. Have spent some time with xW a couple of times in May and July, and had a great time. So did xW. Seems everything we get together, it sends her into some kind of tailspin in which she regrets seeing me, and feels like she is 'falling back into it" (her words, not mine). Leaves me nothing but confused..
Am told by a mutual friend that I should just not contact her, to give her time and space. This I am doing....I only respond when she contacts me, and I do not think I will answer her "Happy Birthday" text today.
Seems to me she is confused, and her future is anything but certain. Trying not to keep my life on hold. I am finding myself isolating myself more and more...
One of these years I am going to enjoy my birthday. It probably just takes time.
Hope all is well. Thanks for listening.
H 51, W 46 no kids T 22 years M 17 years ILBNILWY 2/10 1st D talk 6/10 partial recovery W files D 5/11 long distance separation 8/11 moving forward on D 10/11 legal separation complete 1/2012
