Need help with detaching and hoping to reconcile.

[lillystillinlove]

GWN, Being snotty or condescending really isn't new for him. But there was a time that I didn't take it that way. There was a time that it didn't feel like a judgement, it was playful teasing. Somewhere along the line it changed, at least how I felt about it changed. I think how he means it has changed too.

I'm definitely hypersensitive, I take every incident like that as another reason for him to leave. I'm really off balance around him as soon as I feel negativity my heart races, I'm nervous, I worry about saying the wrong thing. I think 90% of this is me. Even if it's not that much me I need to handle me better. That is the codependent thing I need to figure out.

When it come to his being disrespectful of me in front of our S. I've called him on it and he keeps himself in check.

I honestly don't think that he knows what he sounds like or the impression he gives off. A few years ago he listened to a voice mail he left me and was shocked, he still brings it up. At the time he apologized with tears in his eyes. Isn't that codependent right there! geez...

Ok, I really have to finish that book and figure out some practical steps to change my behavior.