I am not an expert here, but I agree that getting yourself career ready is a really good move. I will be paying off student loans until I die, BUT I do have a secure full time job now.
When it comes to the A, you can't control what she does. But thinking about your actions IF it happens is important. I have always been the passive one. I tend to ignore things and hope they go away. When my W confessed her A....something changed in me. I got...very strong. I drew a line in the sand and became "the leader." It was weird. She said later THAT action drew her to me like nothing else. She said she felt safe and wanted because I fought for her and expected her to do the work to help us heal.
I see now that once the crisis passed, I just went back to being the laid back passive guy again. And now I am trying to win back a WAW who told me that she realized she would always be invisible. I don't want to go against any articles or anything, but because of my passive tendency, being strong and unwavering was what made her look twice.
