I follow the path of tough love and rebuilding the LBS's self worth and self esteem. Learning and understanding boundaries. Growing and becoming a better person. Moving forward in life.
During this crisis both are unstable. And unfortunately some people will martyr themselves for a decade or more while their ex partner has moved on with life.
I know of a few people who passed away too soon waiting for the WAS to come back. Always hopeful and unhealthy mentally for years and years. Living in limbo. Afraid to move forward. Stuck in recovery.
I remember the member who's wife committed suicide. I saw it differently she was not coming back. She was off her treatment. It was such a horrible situation. A no win situation. One of the saddest days on this site. This place is not able to deal with full on bi-polar issues. Dialectical Behavioral Therapy is currently the best way of dealing with this disease. There is no tougher life than loving someone who is bi-polar. There is no shame in walking away from that as well especially if the diagnosed person is not willing to constantly remain in therapy. For they are just a ticking time bomb and most of the DB system just will feed their mania cycle. They need to learn a different system to confront those behaviors.
Flowers always make people better, happier, and more helpful; they are sunshine, food and medicine for the soul. unconditional love is awesome!
