DBing and MLC: why the label?

[Denver_2010]

I don't have a whole lot to add to this topic. I have done a bit of reading on the MLC thing, but not much. I dealt with my W's leaving me as a straight WAS.

BUT, like Starsky, I'm not entirely sure that what happened with my W was not, at least partially, an MLC.

I also believe that prior to my W leaving me, that I was in the middle of an MLC myself. I believe that it began about 2 years prior to her leaving when one of my best friends contracted a horrible and very aggressive form of cancer. This is something that I've never discussed here, but I have had plenty of time to think about why I behaved the way that I did in the months, years, prior to my S with my W. I can trace it to my friend's illness. I think that that situation caused me to begin to question my life choices, my choice to pick a high stress career, my priorities in life, etc. I began to feel trapped. But none of it really had to do with my W. But I ended up taking it out on her and my family.

The S from my W has helped me clarify many of these issues in my mind. And even though I'm still in the process of changing some of those things, I feel that I've separated out what the issues truly are.

So yes, I believe in the MLC phenomenon.