i've taken every opportunity to be there so i could show h my changes etc - and suddenly i'm finding i'm not sure i want those occasions any longer. i have to just go with what come for me right now.
I just did a little fist pump in the air!!! Welcome to my world LOL. And I think this is might be also what's upsetting you when you said you're getting fed up with helping him deal with this whole thing and you're ready for him to deal with it himself. Focusing on you and recognising where he's taking your energy away!
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n the weeks after BD - h talked a lot about how he "lived" my sexual abuse. i have not really understood until i have done all tis work on myself what that really meant. the effect did not come out in overt ways - it came out in fear - fear of everything, mistrusting the world completely.
Oh I see so much of myself in this. Although it wasn't sexual abuse. H did say that he felt like he to pay the price for previous relationships and that I was always waiting for him to abandon me. And he was right. I think if you recognise it it's have the battle and then if we try to stay mindful maybe we can hope to not make the same mistakes in the future or to grow from it.
