I have been reading much about the impact of childhood experiences on the MLCer. His family is nuts-mother and father split up and got back together several times in his teens. Mother laid behind his father's car to keep father from leaving, threw plates at father, constant swearing, but then passionate make up's minutes later- the result 6 children. Father now gone to be with another woman-same one he had the affairs with all those years ago, while mother is stuck in depression-keeping his clothes still 25+ years later, no dating, no working, just waiting for him to come home. I wonder if he superimposes our relationship on that one and expected me to behave the same way? He has never said that, but his family has come up in discussions while he is in depressive funks away from the little girl. He was very interested in how my family settles problems and how my parents interact one day a week ago. My parents are an old European peasant family, love to bicker and tease each other, but would never think of calling names or divorce. (Out of 57 grandchildren I am the only one to be divorced.) For example, my mother and dad were bickering one day, and my dad said something about kiss my A** and my mother went over and kissed him on the cheek and said there you go honey. Then the two laughed for about 20 minutes and cuddled. Cuckoo swears he heard my father say F you to my mother, but both deny it, and I have never heard my father use such language ever and my mother would drop a house on him if he did that. I can't figure that delusion out at all but just walked away from that one, changing the subject.
