Interpretation of MWD and DR regarding infidelity

[ericmsant2]

chances are when your spouse leaves they harbor some deep resentments toward you. Exposing their affair is definitely going to make them resent you more, so to me it seems overall destructive -- it very well may help to end the affair faster, but probably pushes your spouse farther away emotionally in the process and therefore makes it harder to ultimately reconcile.

First I think it really depends on the persons sitch.

IMO, there really is no right or wrong answer here. That said,I do think a person must consider a few things before they go down the path of exposing...

1) EA or PA
2) Has the LBS made ANY changes to address some of the issues that the LBS wants to make. In short, did they give it at least a little bit of time.
3) The WA - Is the walk away a total duche? Are they the type to cheat?
4) Kids no kids - With kids it is a little more complicated.
5) Lenght of the A - did it just start...has it been going on for years?

I can go on and on...my point is that it really is a personal choice. I also believe that the LBS must be in the right place emotionally. Confronting in pure rage is not a good thing. Can they accept or are willing to say F it...OR are they going to become sucidal if the WA ends the M.

I also agree that the LBS must have enough respect for themselves to remove them or the WA in order to miminze the amount of emotional damage that is done the the LBS.

Just my 2 cents.

Eric