I'm the one that set up the mediation. She had not talked to me really until the drive to the beach last week. She basically was agreeing that she wanted a divorce and she loved the OM. Her issue.
I also cancelled the full week of vacation. I told WW that I was not going to stay the full week and that I had to be at work. I'm very glad I did. I did not tell off my MIL, but I did not stay to continue the craziness and drove home. WW called during the ride home, crying about her MIL and BIL. I just listened and then asked to talk to the children. It's her problem.
Theoden, I am doing most of what you listed, except the last two items of the second list 4 and 5, which sounds like great ideas. In fact my father is telling me they have a group like that which I will go to Thursday.
I've always had confidence issues. I hate confrontation and prefer working things out. But this whole thing is changing how I perceive things. I actually am taking more risks than I did during the marriage and doing the things I've wanted to do. I went kayaking with a group of people I don't know by myself, I am going to walks with another group to handle the evenings. I'm taking my kids to church, which my wife never agreed with as she is Buddhist. I cut out of a vacation which I never did before and did not feel guilty. I'm not there yet, but I feel my confidence growing.
