Piecing - Round 1

[Denver_2010]

Here is the potential problem that I see in your case though...

She doesn't think (outloud, to you) that she did anything wrong.

However since you guys are talking, does she understand that while she doesn't feel that way, that you do? And because of that transparency on her part will help your (both) relationship heal?

If she doesn't...I don't see her agreeing to or being ok with the idea of 'allowed/expected snooping' as it were.

Again, not something that we have specifically spoken about. But I have told her that for me to have complete trust in her, and for to have it with me, it is going to take time.

Like I said above, I've done some snooping. But I really, really don't want to do that. I honestly believe that I will know if something goes hay wire here. My instincts of knowing when she wasn't telling the truth and when I should snoop have been pretty accurate over the past 19 months. Unfortunately, every time that I have felt something was wrong, I have been right.

My W is a terrible liar. She can't look me in the eyes, she is distant, and become kinda mean to me. That has been the case every single time that she has tried to not be completely upfront with me, has lied, or has omitted something.

Of course I do know that it could happen and that I need to be aware of my surroundings. But I actually think that is true of everyone who is married, whether or not their spouse has cheated on them before, or if they are reconciling after a S. Unfortunately.