Hopeless optimist...

[Just A Guy]

So we went to MC yesterday... She agreed that she wants to go again, she says she likes how she really digs into our relationship while keeping it about talking and not blaming or fighting.

She extracted a OT of info out and even saw us for 1:20 instead of the normal 55 minutes. I was impressed and now I am scared too.

We found something out, through the discussions we found out that its not that something I am doing is turning my wife off its that for a LOOOOOONG time (since before we have been married) she has not been turned ON by me. She has basically been trying many many different things (except us really talking about it) to figure it out with no success.

This has brought on loads of doubt and guilt. She says she feels like she is cheating me out of my needs and in turn it makes her feel like $hit.

The MC said we def. spend too much time together and that the free time we send together we are in a routine rut.

So out in the car after the MC session my wife says she wants to go again, that she thought a lot of information came out in a short period of time and she wants to explore that more. She also said she wants to try a suggestion that the MC made of each of us planning a simple no pressure date night for each other.

The MC also said we need to find some form alone time apart from each other, time to work on ourselves. Its the second thing my wife brought up to me in the car ride home. She said that since we had moved in together we have NEVER spent more than 2-3 days apart.

And me I am a NEEEEDY guy, I am constantly wanting to surround myself in her presence. So while I truly feel that spending a week apart from each other is not going to be a solution, if she wants to try it then there is nothing I can/should do to prevent it. It will give me a chance to detach while knowing that she still has not once mentioned divorce or any such thing.