I was married to man who I believe is Bipolar. Personality disorder at the very least - our mutual counsellor agreed. I also worried that he would be the type to do something really rash as your son spoke of and if you watch Dr Phil - the most vulnerable time is when you are splitting. And there were times when I questioned whether I was imagining what was going on because it almost seemed too bizarre. But then - I have a list of outrageous, illegal things he DID do that jeopardized our family. If you suspect in any way at all that your children might be in danger - you will have to take action. Can you take DS to a counsellor to talk about why he said that?
Your kids are not that close at all to being able to decide who to live with (or are the ages not updated on your signature line?(I suspect this). Still - this is a tough situation.
By all means - take the kids next week. I doubt she has any chance of changing things now. I assume you have shared custody. You can prove when you had them - how she handled her vacation (asking you) etc. If she feels comfortable enough leaving them with you when she is away - she can't say the opposite in court.
UGH - it is supposed to get better after a couple of years, not worse.
