KML - Wow. That's something I'm going to want to look into when I see the specialist. You have no idea how painful it is for me to even think of giving up my Coco Puffs. Almost like going through MLC a second time...... not the right time/place???
Pager's still dragging me down today. I messed up again. Was with S12 at his game, on a conference call and working. Dropped him off at his mom's. I "thought" I saw him go into the house.... I probably should have waited a bit longer. I was feeling rushed buy the conference call and I don't like typing as I drive. So oops.
I got home and saw my W sent me a text to drop S12 off at EA/OM house after his game. That was followed by a text 30 minutes later telling me how unbelievable it was that I left S12 at her house locked out and waiting for her to come home (He has a phone so he could have called if he wanted too).
The spare key was inside the house. I feel really bad for S12. I didn't mean to do that. He has a key, but I didn't think to ask. I didn't apologize to my W. She was already mad so what's the point in shining a spotlight on more of my failing. Nothing shy of me rescuing orphaned babies from a burning building would have eased her anger.
I can only imagine what she was thinking after I wouldn't even acknowledge her the day before. I can see even more how I'm looking like EA/OM's crazy angry XW. Kind of like putting my foot in my mouth and not meaning to. I can't be in the same space as her so in effect, I am being a bit of an A-Whole. Ugh!
I refuse to validate EA/OM. I dropped off social networking after he reached out to network with me. I closed my account. I figure it's better than consistently in-his-face ignoring him. I never used the account as it is so no harm to me. S12 said the other day he knows I hate EA/OM. My only defense is to tell him he doesn't know how I feel about him since I don't really have an opinion of him.
EA/OM is another reason I try not to think farther ahead than a week at a time. His son and min kids play the same sport in the winter. Different age group, but more than enough opportunity to see him around, and his crazy angry XW.
Don't mind me. Without school work I seem to have more time on my hands than I normally do. So I'm just hanging out more with my new close friends anger, frustration and possibly depression(?).
