This is then a good conversation for newcomers to read. Let's help clarify #7 according to DB. Help me out, because I lent the book to my sister.
But I've detached fairly successfully from my H. His emotions are no longer my own. I am letting him go seek his happiness, trying not to take it personally, am working on my own sh!t, and am keeping the road paved in case he decides to follow it back to me. I've listened to cat04 and brookie and am loving my H through all of this. I love him for who he is and who we once were, and for the vows we took together.
It's hard to detach and it's hard to DB, but I think loving your spouse and staying faithful make a lot of sense for people new to DBing, so I didn't really see where this advice went counter to DB principles.
Every newcomer here is hopefully told right away to read the book and Sandi's rules, and this website even has chapter 1 of the book on it. I completely agree with the ideas behind DBing and would like to see more of the ideas that run counter to it challenged in these forums. This would help both newbies and those of us who've been around a while stay on track.
Adinva 51, S20, S18 M24 total 6/15/11-12/1/12 From IDLY to H moving out 9/15/15-3/7/17 From negotiating SA to final D at age 50 5/8/17-now: New relationship with an old friend __ Happiness is a warm puppy.
