What am I to do? Frightened to to do anything and frightened not to.
Serenity - you say "If you do not take this chance to work on the dynamic between the two of you....". Do you actually SEE a chance?
Must I pack her stuff - against her Attorneys instructions not to evict her?
It was bad enough last night when she asked me to buy food for us and I said no. She just said "this won't look good on you as far as the Attorney will see".
She was a bit knocked sideways when I came home with a Pitza and nothing for her. And then I showed her what I'd already bought on Saturday in the fridge for us both. Sorry guys - should have listened to you and if I had then I'd be in the dog house and the poo.
Serenity - she WASN'T like this when she was employed. This is a direct result of the company going bust. She's NOT normally like this. She wasn't when I met her either. But she IS taking her problems out on me. How can I guide her into seeing where the problem actually does lie? If she'd walked out and stayed with "friend" that would give her plenty on personal time without me being in the background.
I've also got another problem. I just can't be spontaneous in talking. It helps to put things in writing. But there too I forget important things that I'd thought just a few minutes ago. This damn bump is playing havoc!
I know I need to work on ME. I understand that's what the W see's. But it's so so hard. A grind.
I keep refering to my thread from years ago when I saw a happy Mac. Happy in my progress. Happy in the W's progress.
And yes I understand I dropped the ball but dammit - the W saw that bit in the letter.....
Things have changed - years ago - by me while you make no changes until you want to.
Bummer and now at a total TOTAL loss as to what to do. Because I got it wrong. No aims. No guidance. Just a stack of - you shouldn't have done that
No matter how kindly that was said Serenity. Depression looms.
Hard to tell someone to leave when you legally can't. Hard to wait 24 hours for a reply when things are happening here and now - in the day when the rest of the planet sleeps. Hard to talk when your head's damaged. Everything is so damn hard.
