So I decided to let her know that I just want her to be happy no matter what happens next. I told her that I am grateful that she is still willing to go to an MC with me. The panicky feeling is still there, I have no appetite and I am taking a sleeping pill to try and get some Zzzz's.
I am sticking to my workouts and soccer as they keep me busy and provide some degree of "alone" time for her. I think that this is the best thing.
Today I am starting the hunt for another job, I have a feeling the amount of togetherness we have is one of the reasons our fire was choked out.
Another big thing is that her parents have been living as resentful room mates for years now and recently their frustrations have been bubbling to the surface and rearing the anger and despise they hold back.
I think the realization of how long her feeling apart from me has really been, coupled with her parents issue and this first time fantasy of another man in her life has really spooked her.
The MC sent me this email back responding to my ? of her being solution based...
"I am a solution-focused therapist and by that I mean that I am more interested in how you and Melissa want your relationship to be in the future and need to evaluate your strengths far more than the weaknesses. If you are both under stress from many angles it is hard to know just what that future relationship might look like. That is partly what you work on together. I think i do have an underlying bias for marriages working out. My experience has been that most can be revitalized and reworked to meet both of your needs"
Seems pretty optimistic to me it helps a little now if I could just take care of this panicking.. Any advice right now will be greatly appreciated...
