Should I initiate R talk?

[Arsene]

Well, I've been out all day, looking for work and getting some things settled. I also didn't want to be around because W wanted to spend time with D8 this afternoon so i just went to a park and started reading the only English self-help book I could find in the local book store. It's actually bang on though. It's called US, by Lisa OZ. It's about making lasting changes to ourselves and our relationships in general.

Towards the end of the afternoon, I finally decided to go ahead with the answer above with a slight change. I rehashed the whole answer over and over and decided to leave my justifications for buying the guitar and the bike. One of the reasons for this is that otherwise, I felt like I was just being a pushover. She sends a text that criticize me and I agree with everything she says, two days after she goes out with OM, displaying the sensitivity of an icicle? Justifying my purchases, in a small way allows me to stand my ground somehow.

Nonetheless, as the time to get back approached, I felt anxiety and started getting the shakes and a heavy heart. I was not looking forward to seeing her, considering the way things were the last time I had seen her. I was afraid I would act "as if" and overdo it or simply that I would end up showing how I really felt.

In the end, things went well and I behaved with what I might call "just the right amount of poise". I had brought home some food in case D8 hadn't been fed and casually invited W to join us. It turned out D8 had eaten but W hadn't and she accepted, but seemed reluctant. I then told her she didn't have to so she said that if she didn't have to she wouldn't.(?)I just said "OK" and left it at that.

I then proceed to talk to D8 about her day, and made sure she'd done her homework and put her things away. W and I talked about a few things Non-R related and I always kept it short and left the room when the discussion was/seemed done.

I kept myself busy doing stuff around the house that needed doing and when the time came for D8 to go to bed, I asked W if she'd tell her a story, which she agreed to do. I then left D8 and W in the room and went to play my guitar in the living room (Usually, I would stay in the bedroom during W's story time).

When D8 was sleeping, W came out and asked me if i had received her text. I said I had and that I had replied. I thanked her for sharing with me and I asked her to just read my reply.

Then I got up to signify that she should go and she let herself out (I'd had a key of the front gate done for her to avoid a repeat of 2 nights before).

During the whole time, I think I displayed courtesy, kindness, a bit of humour (nothing passive aggressive) and most importantly, "detachment".

I feel much better and I hope I can keep this up.