from the WAS to being walked away on

[strongerthanever]

I really am happy and peaceful these days. I don't contact h really. It isn't going dark, I'm just focused on living my life. I don't want to force myself in h life, I don't want to do that to anyone. I think he really needs his personal space to figure things out and my life is too happy to add drama or stress.

One thing sticks out in my mind. Our d case will be closed and dropped in 2 Weeks if no forward motion occurs. There is a bunch of paperwork that needs to be exchanged and filled in order to proceed forward.
H and I have not spoken directly about what needs to happen next. He has mentioned little things like changing the address on file with dmv and things like that.

I don't like the "on hold" feeling of everything, but then I give myself a reality talk. A divorce decree won't change my life, and there's no reason that I should be living my life on hold. It's not like I want to date or think about any other man, so why push to be legally single?

I think that talking about it while h is sorting through things would be like poking a bee hive with s stick, I'm the one that would get stung here. I think the best thing for me at this point is to pretend as if we already are divorced and just focus on being his friend when he does poke his head through the door.

I think I'll know if and when it's time to move forward in either direction.