Glad to see you have a nice evening. Going out and enjoying yourself will give you a "fresh" boost for the week.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Thanks Snod. Waiting for H to return with the kids. I miss them like mad!!! Not used to being away from them. They are my favorite people in the world.
Hope they had fun. I am sure I will hear everything.
AT BD: WH 41, J 43; Bomb 2/5/2012 Two kids, one dog D Final 6/18/14 J marries OW 1/24/15 "No matter where you go, there you are"
Having a rough time tonight. H retained a lawyer which I am not shocked about but his lawyer is from a firm which supposedly specializes in "father's rights". I can just imagine he is trying to push the issue that I am keeping him from the kids when in reality he is the one keeping himself from his kids.
I stopped and thought about how did I get to this point in my life? I guess I am feeling sorry for myself tonight which I hate feeling. I think of all the love H and I shared and all the good times and think How could this happen? How could he just not care? How can he so easily transfer his feelings to another woman who is practically a stranger?
I am trying to work through these emotions because I do not want to bury them. Sometimes I just feel so alone and so overwhelmed. I am glad to have this board. It's good to talk with others who get it.
AT BD: WH 41, J 43; Bomb 2/5/2012 Two kids, one dog D Final 6/18/14 J marries OW 1/24/15 "No matter where you go, there you are"
So I guess the spew from H is not only being directed at me. S's soccer coach texted me to ask if I had told H about his coaching philosophy. I told him about the situation between H and I and that H was not around much and when we did talk soccer was not really a priority unfortunately. He said he understood and asked for H's number so he could discuss it with him. Basically the coach concentrates more on the skills and achievements of the kids rather than whether a game is won or lost. If a team member is not motivated or isnt a good sport or does not put his all into the game the coach will not give him much playing time. Coach likes S and says he has potential but isnt the most technical or athletic player and I agree and understand. I also told coach that I didn't make it a priority to discuss it with H because I felt he would be totally on board as well. After all, why wouldn't he be? Nope. Coach said H didn't feel comfortable with his philosophy and took offense to it. So the coach called me asking what was up with H? I told him I had no idea why he would be so averse to the philosophy and that I discussed it with S and S was on board with it so why wouldn't H? He asked me if I could be the primary contact and if I could take a few minutes to talk to H about it. I told coach I would do what I could but I could not make any promises. Why does he need to be such an @$$ to everyone? Just unbelievable!!!
H is also angry because I was "ordered" to borrow money from my mom because H spent all the money. Of course I didn't and he was furious. I have money in my own account and H has nothing. And of course that's my fault too.
AT BD: WH 41, J 43; Bomb 2/5/2012 Two kids, one dog D Final 6/18/14 J marries OW 1/24/15 "No matter where you go, there you are"
wishing, Mlcers do not like people who are not "in tune" w/them on anything. The coach was doing his job and, of course, your h didn't like the way he thought and handled things. I do believe the coach got a taste of the mlc behavior. You can discuss the situation w/your h until the cows come home, but he will not change his way of thinking. They become extremely stubborn during mlc. If you mention it, do it once and then let it go...it's not worth you getting frustrated over.
As for the money situation, he put himself in this position, so he needs to learn to live w/the consequences of his actions. Poor boy!
Hang in there!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Funny mentioning the money how he came home with a McDonalds cup. I guess it's all about priorities. Lol!
H showed up at S's soccer practice and talked to the coach. I texted the coach to see if H was on the same page now and he replied I think so but please reinforce. Ha! Easier said than done. H doesn't even look at me. So much for being best friends you know. Lol!
He took the kids to the pool. After being gone over a week I guess he either missed them or better prove to himself that he does care about the kids. I hope he can convince himself because I ain't buying it.
AT BD: WH 41, J 43; Bomb 2/5/2012 Two kids, one dog D Final 6/18/14 J marries OW 1/24/15 "No matter where you go, there you are"
Wishing, What does the coach think you can do about reinforcing his policies w/your h? Your h is a grown man, even though he's acting like a teenager. He's going to do whatever he wants and think whatever he wants and yes, he may appear to be on the same page, but that was then and today he may change his mind. You have no control over your h and trying to reinforce something w/him is just going to aggravate him. I'd leave it alone unless he raises the subject w/you.
His priorities are all about him and what he wants/needs at any given time. The song he's singing is called "me, me, me".
Keep the focus on you and your children.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Thanks Snod. I am trying. Just acting "as if". It does get easier but I try not to poke the bear.
We still have the issue of S's counselor ahead of us. S told H he wanted to go and that I wasn't "forcing" him. H has not brought it up to me probably because he knows he does not have a leg to stand on. I am waiting to hear from my L if there is a legal issue involved but I am guessing not. I will just continue to let H make a fool of himself.
My new manta is "time is on my side". Yes it is!
AT BD: WH 41, J 43; Bomb 2/5/2012 Two kids, one dog D Final 6/18/14 J marries OW 1/24/15 "No matter where you go, there you are"
Most definitely...time is on your side! You have a good attitude about the situation and yes, do step aside and allow your h to make a fool of himself. He doesn't need any assistance in that department!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
