oh ng - i feel the loneliest sometimes when s is here and actually i struggle much much more with h's absence when it's my week with s.
that's when his absence is felt the most.
so having or not having kids - i don't think it matters - because it's fro each of us - as you say - that existential loneliness.
i actually was thinking about that exact thing when i was writing the post - that i wonder if it's more about that than to have anything to do with us feeling alone because our spouses left. i think the loneliness we are feeling has always been there and we just used other things to avoid really feeling it. now when most of us are really facing ourselves for the first time ever- we have to face that too and so we associate it with the sitch, but there's a good chance they are separate.
so you are right in your approach to it -
i think we are experiencing the existential aloneness that is our own individual path regardless of who is in our lives..
and i simply love how you described what we are doing (talk about being eloquent!!)
to SEE the picnic in front of us and imagine the people, the love, the food, the laughs ahead of us instead of thinking we will be scavenging for love, for nourishment, for support...
and oh, i am so not leading the way - i see us all as being on the frontline together, in a long row shoulder to shoulder... and when one of us lags behind - we pull them back into position
((((((( ))))))) zig
me 46 H 38 M10yrs T 11 S10 BD ow 8/11 h filed 9/25/12
"if i could define enlightenment briefly, i would say it is the quiet acceptance of what is"
