Reading your thread helped me realise that I'm not the only one going through this internal battle between my undying faith in my wife and the actual reality. It seems no matter what they do to us we find a way to justify/forgive it. I guess in my case I keep telling myself that she is not the woman I married anymore. She's going through a transformation and every time I interfere, it's like pulling a caterpillar out of its cocoon. It just doesn't want to be this little crawly thing anymore and it'll go right back into another cocoon, no matter how often you take it out. I guess the answer is to be patient and wait for it to emerge on the other side, the beautiful butterfly it's meant to be. The thing is though, butterflies don't really want to hang out with crawly things so it's up to us to make sure we take the time to put ourselves through this transformation as well, and hopefully the R can be saved. If it isn't? Just enjoy being a butterfly.
It seems like you've been at this for a while (sorry I haven't read all your threads) so I know you've put in your fair share of patience, as I have. Let's not allow these years to be wasted. Hopefully we are better people now than we were then and as you say. We are worth fighting for. But wouldn't you rather be fought for by a butterfly than by a worm?
I also feel anger towards my W these days but her actions aren't really hers right now. She's just acting on instinct mode, trying to do whatever needs to be done to get to the other side. Love forgives, with no conditions.
BTW have a look at my sitch. I could use some feedback these days:
M-49 W-42 1D-10 T 10 YEARS M 9 YEARS EA/MLC 07/2010 Separation 28/05/2012 PA confirmed 31/07/12 W Asked for D 31/07/12 D on and off the table since then
