KD – The GAL seems to be the hardest to deal with. 3 day a week I pick kids up from camp at 5:30 get home by 6:00 takes hours or so before there dinners ready 30 more min to eat then bed time routine.
8 o’clock before I even get to sit down. Also because of my job I’m on call at least 2 nights a week so this keeps me close to home because I have to be able to respond to that fairly quickly. As for 180’s I’ve taken to doing much more around the home to help out, this was a complaint of W that I didn’t do enough. Also I have not been angry like I used to be. I was not violent angry or abusive angry just bad mood a lot. We are guilty of spoiling our kids but I was always harder on them than wife I have been working on being more laid back with them, cutting the more slack and just letting them be kids as My W put it.
Galbaby - thanks for sharing your perspective with me it help to know I’m not alone. I also suspect my W is in some sort of mlc though not all the classic symtoms are present.
What do you do when after 3 plus months after BD and W still can’t/won’t make any sort of decision on whether or not she wants to try to work on/ save our M. I am frustrated and really starting to question if I want to work on this… My wife SEEMS to be ok with the roommate living arrangement they we have been enduring the past 3 months, I very much am not. The has been zero emotional/ physical intimacy during this time.
From early in this forum I have been advised not to leave my house or bed. Does there come a time that this would b appropriate? W has no time to miss me or see what life would truly be like if we weren’t together. We are living basically as before BD, sharing kid responsibilities. I have done the 180’s constantly and know they have been noticed.
My wife told me at one point she felt trapped, Well now I feel trapped also. W just found out that her mom will not recive any more treatments for her cancer and will be entering in to Hospice care. Her bff has opted also not to do any more treatments for her cancer at this time. This su@ks!! First off because I know these ppl and love them also, secondly because my W won’t let me close enough to support her, and thirdly because it seem to make our sitch the furthest thing from W mind.
I am scared for my children and my W, if they lose their grandmother (who they are very close to) and their family unit also, I think it will be hard to overcome. Add my W losing her bff and she’ll be left with no one close to her and be a single mom with 3 very distraught and busy children.
W has been going to IC but I know no more than that. The only thing she has shared was that it’s a process and we both need to have patience, which I am really trying to do.
