A New Phase?

[Nblost]

I'm starting a new thread. I'm not sure how much more I'll post, but everyone on this board has been so supportive and helpful. I truly appreciate it.

My H has been in an affair for the past year (started in July 2011). I found out within 6 weeks and confronted him. He admitted it but wouldn't give it up. He went through months of indecision before I filed in March of 2012. H finally moved out of the house in July 2012. His OW lives 2,000 miles away in a city where he goes for work almost every week (and many weekends)

Our marriage had "flat-lined" and we were mismatched in terms of sex. H wanted a lot, I was comfortable with an average amount. We were also conflict avoiders and had a lack of true intimacy. I had also lost myself and wasn't happy.

I think the fact that H has now moved out of the house has been a good reality for him. He has made several comments to me over the past week about how he appreciates me and how he wishes he could see me more and our family could do things together. "I like watching you with the girls and you are such a good mom".

I told him that was nice, but I am trying to build my own life and need space and time to do that. I like doing things as a family too, but if we really want to be a family, then we should decide to work on our marriage.

He isn't saying he wants to give up the affair and his work is crazy...I'm not seeing what I need in order for me to consider having him come back. I think he just wants to continue to keep his options open.

I'm continuing to GAL and focus on myself. I'ts all I can do and frankly, I was running the other night with my new dog (yey!) and felt happier than I have felt in years. Considering I was ready to have a mental breakdown in the fall...I've come a long way!