Chatterbug - sometimes it really does need to be simplified like that. For example, the consequences of me not making our relationship issues a priority, led to the actions of my wife's affair and her checking out of the relationship.
I find this to be interesting.
Was it "our" or was it "yours" or was it "hers"
You know lack of communication goes both ways.
And in no ways does it lead to OM.
I see it as an issue that she did not understand the long term plans of yours with teaching.
That she did not explain to you in a way that you would understand her concerns.
That you two ended up putting the schooling and children first.
Her stepping out was her choice.
It was a consequence of her poor boundaries and decision making skills around the opposite sex.
You know she could have done the following.
"Bill. I am really concerned about us not putting a priority on us. I know that the schooling , children , work and chores are a priority. But I feel that we have lost touch with each other. I would like to start making us a priority again. We need to schedule time as a couple so we can rebuild our romance and our love for each other. This is not to compete with all our other priorities but to ensure that we both know we are important to each other. I am going to lead in this area until we are both comfortable with each other again. If we cannot work this out together then we will go to counseling to help us. Do you understand what I am saying to you? Please explain it back to me."
See that is an option she could have played out. No OM. Being open and honest with you. Leading on an issue she has. So it can be worked on and resolved.
Flowers always make people better, happier, and more helpful; they are sunshine, food and medicine for the soul. unconditional love is awesome!
