Decided to have movie night with my brother last night. I started getting phone calls from home and text from the kids around 9pm. No one knew where Mom was and D11 needed picked up from a friends. I called W, no answer. I then talked to S17, who ended up taking care of everything. All that was fine, but then I slipped up and sent W a nasty text. She responded as you would expect. After a few texts, I said I didn't mean to be an ass, but was scared and didn't like the kids to be home alone late. She responded she was struggling too.
Hey BD....
Just catching up. I'm not on here much anymore, and don't read much here. So I hope that you aren't in any panic mode...LOL
You know, the WAS is going to make some pretty crappy choices with their parenting. That much is expected out of most of them.
I liked the way you came to grips with this, and that you EVENTUALLY put some perspective on it.
With that...let me ask you a couple things....
What was the plan for the evening ?
Did you effectively communicate that you were going out ?
Was she fully aware that SHE was responsible for pickup and drop-off for the evening ?
Was she under the impression that your Son was handling the pickup ?
All in all...
Was there CLEAR communication from you on what you expected from the evening ????
It is like what we talked about a few posts ago..
(Wife), I am going out for the evening. (Daughter) needs picked up at 9 from ____ , and Son has plans that hinge on her being picked up.
I'm not advocating what she did in any way. And I think that it is irresponsible for her to not be available for the children when they call....
What I am saying is...
That one of the things that YOU want to change within yourself, is that judgemental side of yourself. The controlling side of yourself...
What I would like for you to do, is to think about a way in which you can get your point across to her, without placing any blame, or judgement on to her for what YOU would have done differently....
And I would like for you to think about how YOU can handle a situation like this differently the next time....
