There are really two issues that I am struggling with how to deal with. The first is that over the last two weeks she has taken to accusing me of only seeing her as a sex object. I am not entirely sure where this accusation is coming from. she was my first(yes I am a little embarrassed to admit that I was a virgin at age 24) and even then she was the one who initiated intimacy in our relationship. She has said that it is because of my problems with pornography, but I feel like there could be more to it than that. She has admitted that she was with another guy before we were married and he basically just used her and then dumped her. She has also hinted at having been molested by a cousin when she was younger but she has never said anything directly regarding that. I am not sure what I can do to prove it to her but I have never regarded her as such.
The other issue is that while I am watching the kids I try and do service projects around the house for her. This is because after reading "The Five Love Languages" and taking a quiz that our therapist assigned us I figured out that her love language is acts of service. I have been trying to show her that I love her in non-verbal ways and that I appreciate everything she does for our family. I don't expect that she would change her attitude overnight, but I do wish she would recognize that I am trying to do things to make amends. Struggling with feeling of being unappreciated is one of the things on my side of the marriage that led to problems to begin with.
M 39, W 34 M 15 S 14, S 12, S 9, D 7, D 6 Separated: 7/2/2012 Served: 7/10/2012 Divorced 11/5/2012
