Any chance to make it work? I need advice

[sweetbabyred]

Due to H over committing himself in the last few days before his move, I've gotten to spend quite a bit of time with SS. 99% of my stuff is already out of the house, so he and roommate just have to move their stuff out. It's not my problem, as long as it's all out by 2pm on Monday when we close.

H completely over reacted to a text I sent him on Monday. I wasn't sure what had gotten into him, because first he was asking me to watch SS on Tues and Wed, and then decided that I shouldn't see him without supervision because I might say something mean.

I was confused, because I told H that not only had I never said anything bad about him to my friends and family, I would never think of saying anything to his son. I still have hope that we'll make it through this somehow, so why would I ever do that to his son? And he's H's son, so he wouldn't side with me anyway if I tried to do something like that.

By the end of the conversation, he'd calmed down enough to let me watch SS and mentioned that he was tired of people taking advantage of him. I mentioned again the co-dependent book, because he'd had it on his night stand for weeks, but never took the time to read it.

I suggested he just read the first 50 or so pages, and if he didn't think it would help, he could quit. His IC had recommended it during one of their first sessions, so I said that the dr. probably told him about it for a reason. He actually seemed somewhat eager to try this time and suggested that I check it out right away instead of waiting until after he moved next week.

The next morning he came by to drop off SS and apologized for his behavior and over reaction the night before. He made a few more comments and I reminded him that I'd sent him a digital copy of the book, but would get a hard copy as it would be too tough to read on his iphone.

He still wasn't sure how a book would help, but I read a few of the phrases about signs and symptoms of a co-dependent. After a minute or so, he said, I get it, that describes me.

At the library, I found one of the author's newer books on cd and checked that out for him so he could read it on his long drives. Yesterday, when I dropped off SS, I could tell that he'd taken the cd and started to listen to it.

I just want him to understand that he's not all alone in always trying to take care of others and never feeling good enough. I don't know if this could save our relationship, but I'll be satisfied as long as both of us are happy, together or separately.

He just kept mentioning how confused he was. H could never say no and was always being taken advantage of by "friends" so I'll be happy if he just learns to put himself first for a change.

I know I'll be okay and just hope that he can be too.