In home separation? Off / On? Still WAW? Dunno

[breakdownbill]

Thanks Bond, YC & Chatterbug

My W's continuing to dance with the OM has slowly wore away my desire to work things out and has filled me with lots of resentment towards her.

When I was having my IC sessions I remember how significant to me her words were when she said she was going back to dancing & with her parter (OM), 'I'm going back to dancing & I'm dancing with him & I don't care what you think'.

I've tried to shut it out and pretend that it's ok & that I just need to ride this out & be patient & it didn't work.

I'm at a place now where I can recognise what I can't accept and realise that only I can change things for me.

There's no point in making life difficult for my W or anyone else, I know how I feel and I also know the right way to behave & how to treat people with respect.

I don't think I'm ready to say that I'm done yet, because I'll never be done with my W.

We have 2 great kids that are going to need 2 strong parents, working together as mum and dad and as friends.

Just like I was in a fog in my own sitch before the bomb - it was an action that resulted in a reaction.

I'm not going to be tied to any expectations of my W's reactions either way - I know what I need in terms of concessions and commitment from my W for me to be convinced that she is commited to try & work things out and they aren't going to change.

I've been looking into filing & not that I thought it would be simple, but it's going to take some time & money to sort that out.

I might try & see if I can get some legal advice on that score on how to move forward & have all the paperwork in place.

The only 2 grounds I could apply under would be

1. Adultery

or

2. Unreasonable Behaviour

I don't suppose there's anyone on here who's gone through the process or been close to someone who has in the UK who could give us some advice is there?

Bill