I'm learning difficult conversations sometimes happen over time. So the fact that she couldn't handle her emotions and left isn't necessarily a bad thing, and isn't necessarily the end of the conversation.
I believe sharing your views on whether your S should be exposed to overnight guests and their nocturnal activities was important from a coparenting perspective and though leaving the hard stuff to the lawyers is a comfortable idea, this is just one of many decisions for years to come that it would be good for you and S's mom to try to get on the same page about. You think it's bad, she thinks it's fine, keep talking. Would she be ok if S sees you ML with a new girlfriend, hypothetically? What if she's someone you just met, is that ok? Or someone you've dated a month or two? When is it ok? If not ok to her, then she needs to agree with you on rules about how you both behave around S. Some couples cant agree on that, but if you can, it's much better. If you have her buy-in, you don't have to get people to drive by her house at night to check on her. Start with coparenting, try to get agreement, and write it into the legal documents too.
Adinva 51, S20, S18 M24 total 6/15/11-12/1/12 From IDLY to H moving out 9/15/15-3/7/17 From negotiating SA to final D at age 50 5/8/17-now: New relationship with an old friend __ Happiness is a warm puppy.
