Marriage = busted. Help me bust my divorce too!!

[mamabird]

Ok Bond, I will try that. He may not let me give him the hug so I won't push it. We have MC today so that would be a good opportunity to tell him all of this. But he has clearly stated that he wants a D so I am a little hesitant about saying I want a better, happier and stronger M. I believe he apologized because it was the right thing to do and probably relieves him of some of the guilt surrounding his behavior.

I'm a little confused trying to find the balance between detachment and letting him come back vs. encouraging him to come back as you normally would in an A situation. The detachment and standing up for myself has seemed to work somewhat, and since he turned the tables on me and walked way from ME it's a bit confusing. Can you help me on that one?

Yes, you are right, it is definitely a cycle of hurt, anger and pain and it needs to stop whatever the outcome is. I just don't want to overwhelm him at this point.