Tad, A therapist shouldn't have a hidden agenda and now that you are divorced, you need someone to talk to. A therapist should be there to listen and guide you along the way. It helps to talk things out so that you can see where you are headed. Don't give up on therapists! There are some good ones out there.
Now about the om being hot headed...there's absolutely nothing you can do about that. If he lays a hand on her, that's their business. If he should lay a hand on your children, then you can step in...just leave the matter alone. She is no longer married to you and has made her bed, therefore she needs to sleep in it in order to determine that it's lumpy and not at all what she expected.
Tad, turn the focus back on to you...take care of Tad.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
