Needing some guidance... 5

[reachingHigher]

I was thinking about your sitch just now, jks. You know, if you see moving as a way to get OW out of your life it may not work that way.

When I moved 1,000 miles away from my older son's father (never having married him) I still had to sign a paper saying he could take him for X weeks a year. And it increases more each year. That means if OW is still with H....you wouldn't have the daily influence you have now. Doesn't mean it's worse or better -- just that moving doesn't solve the OW problem, possibly.

In my sitch with S18's biological father, he took him one week when he was six years old. I cried the whole week and so did S12, then a baby. I begged him never to take him again, and he didn't. But it doesn't always work out that way.

These are tough times for you. No doubt about that. I long for you to get back to that "I can do it mode" you had recently.

I've found "dance of anger" book tremendously helpful and am trying to start working on healing R within my immediate family I grew up with. Somehow that seems to be taking some pressure off me with H (only happened recently).

Just an idea. I want to help you so much!!! I've grown fond of you as a friend here on this forum and I admire and respect you. You've helped me a lot in my down times and will always be grateful for that no matter what happens!