How Should I respond to her advances

[Arsene]

I got scared and started to talk about our living arrangements and there it got a bit funny when I told her that I wasn't going back to my job but decided to do what i'd always wanted to do. Play music for a living (which was/had been our plan before the holiday - she's also a musician and we had an act together and one of the reasons for her leaving was for her to get more freedom to work on her career). I said I realised that my income would go down but that my D8 and myself could manage well enough but that she (W) would probably need to contribute a bit. She got a bit mad and was about to call me all the names in the book but then, I think she realised she had no rights to do so as she, herself was doing just this. after a few tears, she told me she was shocked and that she wasn't expecting that (I'm not nearly as good as the music thing as she is) but that it was her fault for thinking that i would cover all the expenses. Then we started talking about the logistics of things and things got a bit sour as we realised that 2 households to pay for is more difficult to manage than just one. In the end, she left by bicycle for the room she rents a few kilometers away. She seemed frustrated and unhappy. Part of me looked at this as a victory but after thinking about it again, I felt sad, that i had just put the woman i love through this.

After much consideration, I'm having second thoughts about this situation which happened last week, when i got back. On the one hand, I feel like i have a right to do this and it's part of my GAL plan. After all, it's what we had planned to do before I left on holiday. Why should my part of the plan change just because she changed her mind?
What I'm wondering is my real motive behind that. Is it for me or is it just to get back at her? Being a foreigner in W's country gives me a much better earning potential than hers and this has allowed her to chose her gigs and work her skill over the last 10 years. She never HAD to work so she worked when she wanted and only did what felt good. Now, my decision means that she'll need to take a part (25%) of her meager earnings to help contribute to D8's education while i cover for the total cost of our (D8 and mine) living expenses. Although 3 to 4 times higher than her contribution, I will manage better because of well-paid part time work I can do while working on my music. The problem for her is that now, she only has 3/4 of her wages left to cover her living expenses and that even on her full wage, it was very difficult to do. Now, she'll have to take on more lessons and start accepting gigs that she doesn't necessarily want to do. She admitted that she had expected I'd cover all the costs but also said she realised that she'd had no right to have such expectations.
The thing is, now i feel bad for putting her in this situation and I'm wondering if this is not me putting pressure on her to come back. I'm trying to re-evaluate my motives and the line gets very blurry. Sure she must face her responsibilities towards her daughter and yes, she made the decision to leave (perhaps without thinking about all the logistics of it) but I feel like it goes against everything i have ever wanted for her. I want to support her in anyway I can but i also don't want to be a doormat and go back to a job I was getting tired of (and which drove me to the depression which i think triggered her MLC) just because W chose to go find herself without thinking of the consequences.
Am I doing the right thing? I know I'll be more than capable of managing for my D8 and although a bit more difficult, i could probably also cover the education expenses. Should i just do that and take the pressure off W? Or am I being a doormat if i do?