Just back from visiting with my Mom. Got together with my sister and her 3 boys for dinner last night...they hadn't all been together in over a year, so that was kind of cool. We had a good time and I really enjoyed the evening.
I read about 1/5 of the co-dependent book....really hitting the mark. Sometimes I actually think it's talking about my wife, sometimes me.
Got home a bit ago, walked in the house and unloaded. Saw the camera sitting at the front door and thought I'd download the wedding pics from last weekend. Once I open them up, I find pictures of a motorcylcle that is clearly at OM's house. I take a look at the time stamp and it's Monday at 415. Recall from Monday:
Originally Posted By: Breakdown
Again, after serious discussions, and all, I see baby steps tonight. She calls about S12's swim meet, saying she's otw....he decides he wants to skip due to heat, so I text her that. She calls and says, "do you mind if I go do this work related stuff." I say, no, do what you need to...I've got it under control here. She says great, be home at 7. 645 rolls around and she text me "going to have a beer with joe and his wife, be home 745"...I say "k, thx." Wow, that may be the first time she's actually told me that she wasn't going to be home when she originally said, and actually told me she was going to be drinking. I feel safe...I know what's going on, I feel that she actually trusted me. That may not seem like a big deal, but in our relationship, it is. Maybe it's because she's saying she's done, but she's been saying that every month for a year now so I think that's real progress. She took a step and trusted me....I'm taking a step and trusting her. I will be upbeat and happy when she gets home, with no expectations. Let's see what happens.
That call was at 445, so she's coming from OM's house. Wow. Now, maybe the guy wants to sell the motorcycle and she's helping by taking some pics...hell, I really don't have any idea. It's actually got me a bit worked up, and I'm struggling to find some peace. My heart is pounding and I feel like I'm on the verge of a panic attack.
She's at "work" now, so my guess is she's probably with him...the kids have no clue. Now, that's a negative thought....gotta stop with those. Old habit...bad, old habit. What I'm not going to do is mention it, or act mad, or anything. Maybe 45 mins of cardio and some reading will get me to a peaceful place. If not, maybe I'll go grab a movie. I cannot be like this when she does get home.
