It's not a matter of "fast-forwarding" things. It's a matter of putting boundaries in place for you and your kids that protect them from the cheating spouse's destructive behavior. Legal, financial, emotional (and sometimes physical) protections.
My situation lasted only 3 months, but piecing took FAR longer -- 2-5 years (and we are still, of course, piecing every day to some degree). I know that's not typical, but I don't believe that anyone should have to endure what I consider to be emotional abuse for several YEARS. When one spouse is cheating, the other spouse knows it, and the cheating spouse KNOWS that they know and they know how much it is hurting them . . . and then continue in it, lying to their own kids . . . yes, I consider that emotional abuse.
I guess we just define "works" differently, labug. I define it as "making demonstrable moves away from their affair partner, and back towards the marriage" -- not as whether or not they're being "nice."
Again, maybe I'm in the minority on this stuff. Certainly doesn't hurt to have an alternative voice, if nothing else.
