I'm really sorry for your pain, tpc, but I can't say as I disagree with you. Someone once said "Never make someone a priority who considers you a choice," and that's pretty much what you're doing.
Your wife sounds like she has some demons with which to deal, before she will ever be a quality partner for you again. I pray that she gets there -- it DOES happen, and there's no reason why you guys can't potentially reconcile in the future, with better-than-ever results.
