Great, so based on your response, you have a good understanding of what a 180 is. That's what we are talking about and what you should be doing. Notice something that is... "less than positive"... and work on it as a 180 in self focused way...
In regards to your W's thoughts on D, that is a positive. It means you have time. From your W's comment, it sounds like she's asking for space. So you need to give it to her.
So that means, what you have been doings... the touching and showing love and stuff... she possibly feels is pressuring to her. I'm not saying she isn't liking it. I have no way of knowing that. Still, she may feel pressure because you are being that way with her so she feels that she needs to respond in kind and she may not want to. At least, not right now.
So give her physical and emotional space. That doesn't mean you have to be no contact. That is for you. If you feel emotionally capable (we talk about emotionally detaching from your W and the outcome of your M), then being around her physically in normal, friendly ways, is appropriate.
Your W talking about you returning to being the man she M, that's a good sign. Of course, don't expect that to change anything. And it also doesn't mean turning into the behaviours of a brash, young man. It means that she liked "who" you were. And if you want to be that person again, then do so. Just don't expect your W to suddenly show herself as attracted to you, again. IF she is, it will take time and consistency for her to show it. She needs to believe it is real and permanent and then she has to choose that she likes it.
You may want to add to that if you choose that path. Become the old you again, with some positive additions. Because she now has a memory of who you were and who you became and so her expectations might be that you will once again revert to this current version of you. Being YOU, but slightly different, may help remove that fear from your W that you will revert.
We do remind members not to mind read our spouses and also not to micro analyse them nor the sitch. In the same token, it is good to review the past, including the correspondence. Because yes... in the initial phase of our sitches, we are emotionally stuck and sometimes don't really see what is going on.
Hope that helps. Keep us posted on how things are going with you and also keep asking for feedback.
Sometimes, using this board simply to journal, can be very therapeutic.
