I don't know if you're seeing a therapist or counselor or anything, but I'm with AJM...I'd go make an appt. and say "I want help to build my self-esteem." Nothing but that. Stop trying to fix a relationship that is over; fix you. Don't spend a minute in therapy on her. It's all you. My doctor was really good about this. She sort of steered me off my marriage/divorce and onto "what are your issues that have been with you your whole life; let's work on them." Since you know low self-esteem is the problem, hone in on that alone.
M45 Bomb 6/09; EA 6/10; Divorced 1/11 Proud single mom of 7 little feline girls and one little feline boy "Fall down 53 times. Get up 54." -- Zen saying