JB use the driving as a negotiating point. Don't let emotion cloud your judgment. Did she have an equally good housing option right near you? How far would you have been totally fine with? How much is your choice wanting to punish her by making her do all the driving? Remember that driving in a car with a kid is some of the best quality time there is so don't throw the baby out with the bathwater so to speak. If you let her know what you're thinking about, feeling like it's far and you think you might resent the drive. Then let her talk and listen to her. Then consider sharing the load (if you decide to) then you look a lot more reasonable and considerate then if you state the answer and stick to it rigidly. Just my two cents. I've been following you all along this way and admire you very much.
adinva, thanks so much for stopping in. You've really given me something to think about.
A little history for you - when she first moved out, she was about 10-15 minutes away. Then, in January, she made the decision to move 30 minutes away, the opposite direction. I would be more inclined to work with her if she was closer. 10-15 minutes, I think I can work with, but 30 minutes one way would be extremely tough on a weekday, especially if I was at the office. That would mean about an hour and 50 minutes of driving for me before or after work as opposed to about an hour for her. TBH, there is a small percentage that wants to punish her, but it's more about her choices impacting my life.
Bottom line is I think you've given me enough to think about to the point where I may be willing to bend some, within certain parameters.
