I could really use some support today. Several days ago my H sent me an email which went to spam. He sent a text to S15 asking him to let me know that he sent it and that it was nothing that would upset me. (Inappropriate!) I wasn't willing to read it before today.
The self-centeredness of these MLCers is absolutely disgusting! We are in the middle of a divorce which my H initiated yet he was contacting me regarding our debt information. He wanted to negotiate a split. After that he was wanting to give me a lump sum of money that I could use toward his portion of the debt or keep as a cushion in the bank. Is this unbelievable or what?!!! First of all, I will get a lump sum of money and it will have nothing to do with our debts.
I sent a one-time response that I wish I would have sent at that beginning. I told him that my attorney will work out the debt and proper support and I will not have separate communication regarding this. I also told him that he needs to get the rest of his belongings or they will be tossed. He needs to change his address since I will no longer hold his mail. He also needs to find his own car insurance as he will be dropped from our current policy. I also stated that my only concern was creating a new life for me and the boys and that included finalizing a settlement and divorce as quickly as possible. I wrote that he is not to contact me again, including sending messages through the boys. If he does, I will not respond.
This last part was unnecessary but I wanted to write it for me. I wrote that I am not and never was the reason for his unhappiness and that his issues started long before we met. Rather than deal with them he chose to blame me and traumatize me and the boys in the process. I feel certain that he won't "get" any of this and that's OK. It was my way of showing him that I will longer believe what he says about me and the reasons he left.
I'm really angry right now. He clearly has plenty of money while I am just barely scraping by. My attorney has assured me that it will change once the debt and income statements are exchanged. She has run the numbers and they are in my favor. My biggest mistake was not pursuing this months ago because I was holding out for reconciliation and didn't want to push him further away. How foolish! I was advised over and over on this board to take care of the finances.
At this point it doesn't matter how much it hurts, I will push for a quick divorce. I need to get out of limbo.
